Very Small Feet

I finally decided it’s time… to go back to the gym.  I did start running after I had baby G but I over did it and got injured and got really unmotivated.  I am feeling just fine, a little bigger than I used to be before baby G but again it’s ok. But I am not as strong as I used to be. And I need to be ready to chase after the boys and carry at least one of them if needed to be…. So I rejoined my old gym. And on my 1st day on the way in I bumped into one of the trainers. It was nice he is one of the really nice people and was very supportive!  Week one I only managed to once for a class. It was fun! And hard. And I really felt my muscles that I didn’t feel in ages!  Week two I did two days class and just worked out by myself. I love spin classes but I did really well at it and the entire body was hurting for days. Save to say I need tk get some protein to help me with recovery.  Even after this little efforts I feel more energetic and feel like body is changing a...

So yeah once again it’s been a while…  Christmas happened. Holidays. New variant of covid too…  Dealing with life, loss (we miss you very much and every day) holidays, work stress and making sure it’s all ready…  So it’s been a while.  I have some things to review. And more thing I want to talk about….  So hopefully this will get more regular. I enjoy how visual Instagram is but let’s be honest not many people read the caption and I don’t want to that person … like I don’t really how many regular readers I have, maybe it’s a force of habit or maybe I m deluding myself however my writing improved over the years…. So yeah stay tuned for more of my improved writing!  Oh and I have short hair now! 

Life took over like it always does...  In brief I am trying to get into routine with two kids. And get the little into routine. But it’s tricky. He is breast fed and it’s in demand and we are still figuring it you. Hopefully 12 weeks check up can provide some advice. Fingers crossed. Oh and breastfeeding goes well. We even had a feed al fresco. And no one was flashed or got milk into the eyes!  The big is being happy being back at school and well holidays are a bit tricky... but we are doing alright. Some days are better then others.  I didn’t run since I have injured myself. I have recovered and am stronger. Lots of walks!  Spring time is pretty awesome for walks! But it was snowing today... but then we also wore shorts  And we both had our 1st rounds of vaccinations... days are getting longer and it feels like new life again. Restrictions being eased and of course some idiots already abused it.. these cov-idiots make me so angry. Like we all want this pandemic...

So as you might have figured it out we had our newest Edwards in January. And life had been well busy...  His arrival was very different to his big brother, so easy and calm and collected. We went to the hospital dead on 39 weeks. With all the covid restrictions we were very lucky to have Steve with us from pre op, during and recovery. Over 7 hours! And we were home  the next evening.  Scheduled Caesarian section is very different from all that terrible traumatic delivery we had with E. All the doctors, midwives and other amazing staff came in and introduced themselves and talked me through the procedure... also we had a student midwife with us from my regular appointments, oh we like Kate!  I walked to the theatre, met more people... they moved Steve around the bed so he can see me and talk to me. The anaesthetist held my hand while spinal was put in, it was the most painful thing out of all the procedure.  Baby was out very quickly and all I could think I want...

So I have never actually wrote about this ... not saying exactly what it is and how is it... and well it’s not easy.  About 2 years ago on a nice summer day we have been told, that my partner suspected and what I was in denial about that our little one has autism.  Everyone experiencing autism differently, and it is different for everyone. Spectrum is wide. Some have extra gifts like music or math, some cannot stand certain things, like wearing certain fabrics or maybe loud noises.... some like Egg don’t really speak.  There is no cure and it’s is not a disease...  There is a lot of learning and understanding to do. We are all getting better at this. Some days are great others not so much.  But he is a loving happy boy. He is now trying to talk and learns new things everyday...  My hubby is excellent at finding all these incredible audiobooks, can’t quiet read about it, on the subject. The best discovery so far was  The Reason I Jump by Naoki Higashida...

I know I was absent from here but you know it’s been well different.  Life has been put on hold. Keeping sane been a priority.  We have been doing some homeschooling, some days better than others but we did it. And we are still doing it. I am also hatching plans on bit more school stuff on holidays. The child seems keen.  I also rediscovered my love for garden. Especially not that it is in full summer mode I m very much looking forward to poppies to start to bloom. I planted them for two years and it’s the 1st year they are out and strong!  And thanks to Great British Sewing Bee I am very into my sewing now too. Still am a bit scared to use actual fabric but the pinafore I made out of old bedsheet is rather lovely!  And next week little man will be going back two school. Only two days a week but it will be nice to do something different.  Hope you all keeping well too! 

Unless you lived under the rock you know that 2020 is pretty much cancelled... some one sneezed, didn’t wash hands and didn’t think that handles are dirty. And well we have it. The world is on standby the world is social distancing and self isolating... that is a responsible thing to do. It’s scary and uncertain.  But it’s spring.  Nature is waking up and it’s beautiful.  It’s worrying that some of us are off work, kids are off school.... but this too shall pass, like everything else.  It is normal to worry and stress but how often you are in the house with either just yourself of the others? The  opportunity and endless and are only limited by tour of creativity.  And with internet there are so many positive things at your finger tips from cats videos and singing people in high rise Italian cites and news that water in Venice is so clear that the fish came back.  Stay strong, stay positive! I will be too... 

Music plays a big role in most people’s life. Somehow is always there on the background... it helps me run, cheers me up and sometimes is a good crying accompaniment.  I can’t play an instrument, but I would love to have a go at drums. I can’t really sing but it really doesn’t stop me.  Day before yesterday hubby passed me his phone with a sky news head life that Dolores O’Riordan passed away ages 46. Unexpectedly tears came to my eyes...  Cranberries were there when I was forming as a person. They were there when I was going home from birthday parties being sad that I am not one of the cool kids... Dolores was singing when I moved to Switzerland. And suddenly I realised this was over decade ago and I am not a teen anymore and duffle I bit of my younger self gone away...  But music is forever. Despite shortcomings of Pitch Perfect 3 I was super happy to hear Zombie... 

One of my friends from high school posted this picture on Facebook It says "Friends are like stars. You don't see them all the time but they are here" and it's a great sentiment and became really true for me since becoming a mother. I think my friends Marzena and Eva would agree. We all used to work together and had great relationships but since they had their boys we barely see each other. Also the fact that they don't reside in Cardiff but are in smaller towns in South Wales. And I am jealous of their sea views! Last week very inexpected I got a message from my university friend Lindsey who I haven't seen in years.  So we met up had a good chat and a coffee. Sadly she lives all the way in Tenby. Once again jealous of the sea views... it was so nice to see her even if only for few hours.  We both are mothers now and share the same struggles with lack of sleep. Even if we haven't been talking we still have common interests, like making r...

So what do you do? Do you love what you do? Does this fulfil you? .... I had a choice, stick with same girls I went to school with and be in the mainly females and study languages (at that point I truly had enough!) or go away to Switzerland to do degree in hospitality. Guess which one I chose... I was never encouraged to do things I wanted, nurtured... It is not the Russian way... I was to provide for my self as fast as I can and I did I loved my 1st placement for most of the time. I loved ladies I worked with, the customers. And they loved me back. But it was not to last. The hospitality industry is not an industry in UK. Even if you think about how much money is involved in it... Like entire Britain depends on it. Weatherspoons.... Wagamama... and many more.... But our waiters are students, people who don't care mainly.... but there are some that do and we need to appreciate a good service. I have been talking about this for a while now, some waiters are professionals ...

I like to know that certain things in ever changing life stay the same. I always know that if there is anything wrong I can run away home to Russia. It would involve a day of travelling but I would get there and will be supported and looked after no matter how old. Provided I make a joke, do dishes and cook at least one meal.  And that I will always have people where who I can n be in touch for months and months but when we do meet its like we are 17 again and never parted just became bit more serious and wiser with experience. Yesterday that has changed. My dearest friend moved...and to another city but to another place and to another life all together. Bali. Suppose now I have a place to stay there... hint hint! (I know you told me not to put up this pic online... hahahaha) I wish that all your super plans will come true and that you will be super happy there. Love you lots and be safe!!  P.S. I can only imagine who you felt when I left all these year...