Monday, 28 August 2017

Bank holiday. Hot day.

This last bank holiday treated us with some glorious sun and clear sky. And sleeping if you are a toddler is super hard. It's just warm.
Also I really didn't want to do anything so naturally I packed up the swimming stuff we had in the house, bikini for me and trunks for the child (our regular more suitable for pool adventure stuff was at my in laws) along with water wings we heard out for about 40 mins hike to the pool. 
So I naively thought we will be there right after opening time so it should be crowed and surly people would rather go the beach or something. Well we were greeted by this... 


  
I wanted to run back home and hide. But I thought I shall not be defeated by this and to be fair the queue moved really quickly. Must be some technical difficulty, or something along these lines. 
And pool was fun. Although kid tired to climb all over jacuzzi bit and were whistled at, and he is really strong willed yet totally lost without me. I put him on top the silde telling him I will meet him on the bottom he didn't hear and looked a bit lost... but all is well.
Then he had a cheeky meatballs in Ikea while I had a salad and admired his apetite after an hour long swimming. And of course took some photos 


All was going well and after a nap we went around the block for a scoot 



Well note to self. A tired child who was up early and after the pool will get hot and bothered rather quickly after scooting on the hot afternoon. Some people enjoyed the look of a super mum with a three year old on her shoulders holding legs with one arm while carting a scooter with another. 

All these things seem like a nightmare on the bank holiday. I think they would have been if I didn't have a child to entertain. We were active, we had fun, he had a tantrum or two but so did other kids with their parents. It was busy but I don't care, child and I had fun and that's the most important thing. 

Saturday, 26 August 2017

Too much of the good thing

Well it was too good... just too good..
For about a month the little one sleeps through the night and if he does wake up then only for a second. 
And he wakes up about 6.30am and sometime even 7.30... and few days ago he got up at 8.30am! 
I thought we conquered the sleep thing... or did we?



On Friday we went for a long walk in the Bute Park. But we didn't take a usual route we went by the river, there is small foot path there. So Egg could just run ahead of us and be actually totally safe, no bikes around.  



Here he is looking for big stones. 
We got home a bit later then dinner time and pretty much since 5pm until bath at 6.30pm he didn't stop eating and grazing. 
And the next day he was up at 5am... and was up a lot at night. We got him over tired and over fed. 
I thought it was a one off. I hope it's one off. 
Today he woke up at 5min to 5. This is progress right? 
But I am exhausted. There is always so much to do when you are stay at home parent. Even if I went to bed around 10 last night. Yeah I am this rock'n'roll Saturday night I was in bed at 10pm
So what we have learnt. I need sleep! Don't overtire and overfeed your kid before bed.  

Monday, 21 August 2017

Relationship with body and with running!

I am a lazy person. If I do not feel like going running I won't. I sort of wish I was more well committed to running! But it is also comes with the fact that I don't actually have time, not really. Hubby works silly hours to keep me at home before Egg goes to school. When little one is in nursery I either catch up on house work or I am studying. Sometimes I am so busy that I do not get to sit down till like 9pm and then ideally I need to be in bed around 10pm because the kid will be awake early ... so I give myself a permission to be lazy... also I am taking a year off races. I blogged about this before but it is something I still struggle with. And not only that... I feel a bit guilty that I don't run. 
In a way I guess I gave myself a permission to be lazy. 
But and here is a bit but... I guess. I like me better when I was a bit leaner. Not necessarily thinner but leaner more tonned. 


(Big cheeks and very big hair)

I haven't been light thin since I was 15 and I am
Ok with it. I am also ok with my changed body after having Egg. I do miss sometimes going braless. And I am ok that I am more of the size 12 now. It's ok to gain weight and ok not to be the same, and I am happy with my body. I grew a human I can walk with no trouble for over 10k daily, my body is amazing! 

I was meant to go for a run with a friend but she had to cancel I actually felt a bit disappointed that we can't go for a run but I didn't go by my self... I did some cooking and tidy a bit. 
It feel like I have not only taking a year off races but year off running and this isn't my aim. 
And also just last week I have listened to Scummy Mummies talking to Ruth Field who wrote Run fat bitch run. She said that running is just really good for you, which is true especially now that I am in my thirties, and that it is easiest and cheapest exercise there is. Like I didn't know it before. But having some one else saying it, it made me sad I gave up on it. So here it goes at next available moment I shall go out a run! 

Wednesday, 16 August 2017

Growing up

One of my friends from high school posted this picture on Facebook


It says "Friends are like stars. You don't see them all the time but they are here" and it's a great sentiment and became really true for me since becoming a mother. I think my friends Marzena and Eva would agree. We all used to work together and had great relationships but since they had their boys we barely see each other. Also the fact that they don't reside in Cardiff but are in smaller towns in South Wales. And I am jealous of their sea views!
Last week very inexpected I got a message from my university friend Lindsey who I haven't seen in years. 
So we met up had a good chat and a coffee. Sadly she lives all the way in Tenby. Once again jealous of the sea views... it was so nice to see her even if only for few hours. 



We both are mothers now and share the same struggles with lack of sleep. Even if we haven't been talking we still have common interests, like making random foods like kimchi and kefir (well I get mine from Continental shops), like raising boys, books we don't have time to read. 
However when I am random pottering around and going back to study she started her own business. So big shout out to The Wildflower Nursery! 

Sunday, 13 August 2017

From free range toddler.. little wins

Raising humans is hard. I guess I never thought it would be easy but I didn't expect my kid to have such strong will and be so vocal about having stuff his own way... yes the same kid that doesn't talk.
Besides trying to get him to talk we also trying to "break" modify his behaviour. And of course he is at his worst with me. Typical. 


 
Basically I had to always give in to avoid the meltdown. It's easier. Yeah sure my world revolves around him, but I should not be bullied by a three old who thinks running around the trousers around the ankles is so fun and so great! 
Now I tell him no. Or I explain why I do not think jumping into the wall is not safe. It usually resolves in a end of the world yell but he does as I tell him. And more often now he complies without much argument. 
Like last week I was super pleased that he was helping me at launderette without much grouching and getting into trouble. And he didn't want to be these he would just sit in the pram. 
I also can tolerate him yelling, not crying, for much longer. This also means that I can actually do some stuff and don't need to wait for him to be asleep. It's a nice change. 
It's little wins every day. No matter how long. I'm in this war for a long term. 
Just must remember that I am doing it for his own good and my future sanity. I am not very sane now but it will go back I hope. Hubby also hopes to get me back. Apparently I am different since having Egg. But this story is for another day. 

Life with no washing machine. Rant!

I understand that the thing I am about to rant is a privilege and I really have no right to... but I am super annoyed and well, hope you will learn from my mistake. 

Two and a half weeks ago as I was putting Edgar to bed my washing machine started making this rattle noise that I had to abandon reading Gruffalo and run downstairs... the washing machine drum had pretty much fallen out. 
"Damn", I though! This will cost as much to repair as getting a new one. And we have had it with the house when we bought it... so t was used and actually older model really... 
Only once we didn't have a washing machine, when we loved him Bath. But there was a launderette pretty much next door... and when we had to buy one we went wth Argos, that was on the next street when we lived in Birmingham. 
Hubby convinced me to get a washer dryer in one. I won't dry stuff all the time but sure it will be helpful. And once again I went with Argos.



After the massive disaster with the online payment when my card been charged twice and I had no order number... yes that actually happened. Two phone calls, one to Argos (the lady on the otter side was very apologetic and explained that the money will be retired to me but she couldn't give me any time and frankly wasn't sure why this happened but it did happend before) and to my bank who informed me that matter been resolved and the funds been returned. Thank you bank! I went to the Argos shop. ("Next time use A.O. 2 day delivery," said a helpful memener of staff in my school)... Machine I actually wanted wasn't available but my second choice was there. Lady on the till explained that with in 5 days I will be getting a phone call and 2 hours prior to delivery too. So at latest by next Monday I would be able to wash stuff and not have mount of washing... 
Yeah right! I got a text informing me about the delivery being in 2 weeks time... 
Not a happy bunny I called and asked why. "Oh it was pushed back" why?! They weren't sure. Perhaps it wa s that the item wasn't available... so if this is the case why couldn't I get my 1st choice then... 
At this point I wished I've cancelled my order and looked else where. But I thought I will give them a call back. I have been in touch with Tesco who was much more helpful on the phone and explained the delivery to me. Well it would be the same time. It wasn't worth a hassle.... 
But the milkaholic like to get nuddy in the night and wee in the bed... I need to wash things. We do have enough clothes to last us but not with Egg's bedding. 
Thank you my friend Viera who picked up a load and dropped if back off with me in 2,5 hours. 
And I have been to my local launderette. Peace and quiet all by myself. But yesterday I had to take little one with me. He charmed them all there. But it was difficult. And over this time I have spend anot £50 just on doing laundry... and I have paid for my washing machine... this makes me so mad! 
One good thing, I now I know my neibouhood a bit better. One of the ladies working in the launderette lives around the corner from us. And another lady told me that she has a grand daughter how old she was etc... and she was really praising my little one which we both loved and were ever so grateful. 

Thank you Argos for being so unhelpful! Wasting my money and my rate free time!  And I shall not use your home delivery ever again! 

Saturday, 5 August 2017

(Not) talking Wonder

Edgar is almost 3! 
I cannot believe this, it like it was just yesterday I was waddling around with a massive bump thinking of what to name my little egg...
And he doesn't talk....
When Egg was about 18 months old he used to sing Twinkle Twinkle and so a little star with his hands. He used to call us mama and dada and call all small animals bunny. Well my mother's cats were bunnies. 



And now he doesn't say much. Only bird language. Lots of different noises. Sometimes he would say a word or even two and then won't say them again... 
I am pretty convinced that he is just stubborn. We know voice and words are there. He just can manipulate us to get his own way.... 
But then we also have all these medical professionals around us. We saw speech and language therapist (SLT), paediatrician and regular visits to our health visitor (HV)... I really didn't find SLT helpful she produced a terrible report based on her observations. Well if she was observing my child for 2 hours she would have noticed that he isn't wearing nappies and wouldn't tell me about how he "didn't ask to be changed"... so I am not convinced and not a fan. Paediatrician thought Egg was brilliant but couldn't see anything so referred us to one who specialises in development. 
We are also waiting for audiology appointment later this month and neurodevelopment too. 
With the HV we are trying to modify Edgar's behaviour... he is spirited and like his own way is the only way. This is actually works... he listens and is calmer.... 

But all this is so stressful. However, I am optimistic and positive that he is just stubborn... 

Well in any outcome... my boy is amazing.

So for all the mamas and papas out there who are struggling with the same or similar issue, it will be better and stay positive and have faith in your kids abilities. 

Tuesday, 1 August 2017

Taking a year off...

Ever since I have discovered I can run I was doing races pretty much every summer. Exception was when we have moved away from Cardiff but even then I still did Surivial of the Fittest in 2013 and Birmingham half the same year. 
Admittedly since Edgar came into our lives I exercise less even ... not at all... I still managed few races and even got the dream time of 10k in 58min. 



Yeah it's a great time for some one who doesn't really take running seriously! 

But this year I felt the pressure to go running. The pressure to do the races. And I didn't feel happy about it. So I maybe run once this year by my self and once with the club. But as for races... I am taking a year off. 
I wouldn't say I am out of shape. We still walk a lot. Thank you Fitbit for keeping me on track. But races are complicated. I need to sign up on time and with enough time to train. Also I want to do as many as I can and can afford. Yes these things cost money. Not much but it all adds up. Also usually races are on Sundays so I need a sitter. And not many people can and will... if before it was just the matter to scoff down some bagels with peanut butter and banana, pin the race bib on and do the race now it is more complicated... I need to arrange very much in advance and I need to work to have disposable income. But mainly a mate to watch Egg. 
So since I have not run much but I still feel the bug I responsibly taking a year off. This won't be enjoyable running, besides toddler needs me still and I need to not stress about running... I have enough stress as it is.