Saturday, 16 July 2016

Body image. Rant

I was very mad today... someone said to my mother that I could do with losing some weight.... And my mother being my mother and being outraged too told me. So here are my angry thoughts on the matter.

Russian girls worship the beauty. Any beauty. Sometimes at any costs. I never was skinny, I always had curves, not lumps and bumps but very prominent hips and occasional belly. This is the way I am. And it is hard just to be able to accept it. And I am lucky to be with amazing man who doesn't care what shape I am and if I giggle and wiggle. 

In my culture it is common for relatives to lay a hand with new addition to the family. Like my step dad's friends recently became grandparents and are at their daughter's almost every day. Well you know so she can have a shower and such I was told. I make do, for me to have shower alone with no one touching my belly button or shoving me around the bath tub is a rare treat... That said I truly miss the physical exertion of the good workout. 

Don't get me wrong I wouldn't have it any other way. But I like my alone time, I can just chill and occasionally sit down and not do everything else. Not jump around the tv or curl up on the yoga mat, I just want quiet time. Motherhood is hard. 

I don't do diets, however I love veg and my healthy meals, but I also love puff pastry, cheese and wine. And not necessary in that order.

Yes, I have a post baby tummy (not to use the mum tum, I am proud of the fact that I have made a human, and I will not use this insult on mumming!) but I can still run really well. Hell, my legs and my whole body got so much stronger that I have finally beat that Nemesis of mine. I did 10K in less than an hour. 

The body confidence is hard. On everyone. No matter what shape. At this moment in time and in life I am size 10 sometime I opt for 12 because it is lose... it is hard to have your bits showing when you haven't had them... I know I am not at my best. But still I made a human and I showed that 10K who's the mummy! 

I can't wear dresses in hot weather because my thighs rub.. I opt for shorts. Longer shorts. That are hard to find on highstreet. But I love my super strong legs for pushing me harder... when I sprint, that happens really rarely, I fly. My feet go so fast that barely touch the ground and it is an amazing feeling... 

I know the person who said that was just inflicting pain and dealing with their own insecurities.. but dude, I can so outrun you. 

I don't want to be skinny, I want to be strong! 

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